2014... A Grip on My Life

There are many things that I admire about my sister-in-law, Alison.  She has perfect manners, is always on time, always has her act together, can keep up with her blog, has well-kept house, but without a doubt, what I admire about her most is the type of mother she is; she is an amazing mother.  Her kids are her top priority.

I remember a few years ago her and I were talking about a conversation between her and my brother. I don't remember the exact details, but basically my brother made a comment about what she had/ or hadn't done around the house that particular day.  To his comment, she responded that she had been playing with the kids, because that was her job... a mom. 

While pregnant with Briggs, I too ,decided to become a stay-at-home mom.  As a stay-at-home mom,  I have spent the last nineteen months trying to get a grip on my life.  Yes, part of that was caused by some circumstances that were unfortunately out of our control , but just as much has been self-inflicted.  You see, to me, being the perfect stay-at-home mom, with my act together, meant having a perfectly clean house, with home cooked meal on the table each night, When we first moved into our new house, one of the first things I created was a cleaning schedule. This way, I would ensure that every inch of my house was cleaned each month. You know fans, baseboards, windows, etc. Yes, you read that right... the perfect stay-at-home mom had nothing to do with being a mom, but rather having a perfect house.  Sad I know.

Over that last couple of months, I have really begun to reevaluate what was important in my life and what are  my true priorities.   I guess with mom's passing that is only natural. I knew that I wanted to work towards finding a better balance in my life. 

This really hit home last night.  While Brian was brushing Stella's teeth, he asked her if she had a good day.  Her response, with the biggest smile on her face, was "Yes, and mommy played with us today."  Wow... with complete innocence that little girl drove a blow right to my gut.  To be honest,  it was a novelty that I spent  the day playing with my kids.  At that moment, I knew that in order to truly get a grip on my life, I simply needed to work towards being a better mom.  

A quote I read a while back really got me thinking, "Everything that is truly important in life has a name."  To me, Stella and Briggs, Brian, my family and friends are what is important, not baseboards and ceiling fans. 

And I am going to make it my goal this year to focus more on them.  I'm not saying that I am going to be able to let the cleaning and other stuff go.  Come on, let's be serious.  I am going to take some lessons from my sister in law,  instead of my day's plan revolving around what I need to get down around the house with the kids worked into the plan, I am going to work towards making my plan revolve around doing things with Stella and Briggs and working the other, less important, stuff into the plan.   Because ultimately, I want my children to remember me for the same reasons I admire Alison.