Thank your for your parenting advice :-)

This past Saturday the Iowa Hawkeys played the Iowa State Cyclones.  Needless to say, it's a big game, especially for our Arizona family, the Bollards.  We all meet at a sports bar to cheer on our team.

We had so much fun cheering on our teams, and hanging out with the Bollards.  And best of all the Hawkeyes won the game!!!

When the game ended, I packed the kids up, said my goodbyes and left.  As I was leaving, a lady also walked out with me.  She turned to me and under her breathe mumbled, "What kind of mother takes her kids to a bar?"  I asked her to repeat herself because I assumed that I must have heard her incorrectly.  She then stated that "A bar is no place for a baby."  I started to walk away because confrontation is usually not my thing.  But the more I walked the madder I became.   I turned and thanked her for her parenting advice and asked if there was any other bits of wisdom she could bestow on me and my children since I appeared to be such a unfit mother.  She assured me that her advice about not having my kids in a bar was all she had.  At that point, I just couldn't let it go... I again told her how much I appreciated her advice and expressed how I was sure that her children had grown up perfect with such a wonderful mother.  And of course, she assured me they had.  At that point the only thing I could do was walk away, but as I did I said that I agreed with her, our children would grow up different... mine wouldn't grow up thinking they were better than everyone and with their nose in the air. 

As I drove home, I couldn't believe how mad her comments had made me.  I am usually not one that cares that much about what others think, especially people I don't know.  However, I obviously have a sensitive spot when you question my parenting.  I am not saying that I am a perfect mom, I question decisions that I make every single day.  I replay situations in my head as I fall to sleep, and I pray each morning that I will be a great mom because my kids deserve the very best.  But I do not believe that taking my children to a sports bar, to watch a Hawkeye game, on a Saturday afternoon makes me a bad mom.  I pride myself in having easy going children, who have fun and don't take life too seriously.

I read a quote that a friend posted on Facebook today and it was so appropriate... "Parenting is the easiest thing in the world to have an opinion about, but the hardest thing in the world to do." 

Parenting is hard, I feel so very fortunate that I have found so many wonderful friends that are embracing this difficult job with me, that understand exactly what I am going through, who can laugh with me and cry with me.  It is because of them that I can laugh about the fact that I am a "Sweet Home Alabama" cliche and have "my baby in a bar."

On a sidenote... the Bar, that I took my children to had high chairs and a kids menu.  Ok, I feel better!

No More Bedtime Battles

It still amazes me that as easy as a child Stella was about going to bed as a baby, she turned into such a monster over the last year about bedtime.  I do take A LOT of the blame for creating the beast, pregnacy does terrible things to your reasoning.  I mean desperate times call for desperate measures.  I am slightly embarrased to say, but at our worst, we had a child that would run out of her room, screaming as if she had been possesed by the devil.  I was to the point that I hated bedtime, I could feel myself getting anzious around 5:00 each day, knowing that bedtime would be coming in three hours.  It was bad!  We then gave in and just let her fall asleep in our bed, oh then it got to the point where we would all go to bed together... at 8 o'clock.  Not my proudest parenting moment.

We spent the month of June back in Illinois and I knew when we got home it was time to make a change.  Stella was starting school in August and she needed to go to bed, by herself, in her own room, like a big girl.  Everyone I talked to suggested using a sticker chart with her and create a bedtime routine, so that is what we did.  Auntie Alison also suggested that not only can Stella gain stickers, but she can also loose them.  Her reasoning was that we don't want to be able to pick and choose what days she goes to bed like she wants to... she needs to do it consistently.  I completely agreed.

On June 30th, we started Stella's new bedtime routine and her sticker chart.  And on August 23rd Miss Stella finally earned her 14th sticker and her baby doll tent.

Bedtime is now a peaceful experience in our house :-)  Stella goes to bed happy and that makes us happy too.  Our next step is to get her to stay in her bed all night, instead of ending up in ours.  Once Stella's room gets put back together, we will begin her new sticker chart for staying in bed all night.  Her next goal... A fish?